[To make up for any parts that were difficult to hear over the backing music, here is the full transcript for Message/Passage with my video cues included.]
It’s time I was honest.
Two years ago today I started here, and I’ve struggled with this concept of honesty every day since.
It’s not so much that I don’t know what it is I want to accomplish here. I’ve just been so unsure of myself. Do people really want to hear what I have to say? The past two years I have assumed they didn’t and I tried my best to skirt around the edges of making things that meant something to me.
Why do I do that? Why let myself down? Am I afraid? Would it really be any worse, would I get any more flack than I do now, if I was just – honest?
I seem to have spent a good proportion of my adult life traveling alone on trains. I attribute my survival over the past three or four years to this seemingly trivial activity. Spending those few minutes trapped in one spot while having everything move around me at speed forced me to think and made me realise how, in spite of my youth, my own life was passing me by.
“I need to do something about this feeling…”
They say there is no evidence for faith. What isn’t doubted is just another fact to be learned.
But I say there is one particular type of evidence for faith that is experiential. Sometimes there is a knowledge within a person that convinces them of a truth they would be hard pushed to explain rationally. And yet I have seen people like these choose to follow this irrational knowledge and become the most fulfilled and passionate individuals I can name.
Even if I am wrong, I would rather my life be meaningful and beautiful than rational.
My truth, the thing that leads me reluctantly through unfamiliar lands and causes me a pain that I have to carry with me daily, is this:
I have a message to give to the world, and the passage way is music.
The people won’t fall for a facade. I have to believe in what I am doing or no one else will.
[fade to snow]
I have let go and I am tumbling.
“I don’t care any more…”
and yet I care more earnestly than I ever have before.
And out of the chaos comes a moment of clarity. This is just where I’m meant to be.